About three weeks ago I decided that I could no longer wear my old undies and that I needed to move on to pregnant panties. I have seen the size of these things and the idea of me needing and purchasing them was quite overwhelming!
I come from a generation that a small piece of cloth and string serves just fine as comfy undies. Suddenly that small piece of cloth was no longer comfortable. I was terrified to break down and go into a store and buy prego size panties, those things are huge!
One day on my lunch break I decided to go to Target and look around. I looked all over the underwear department but found nothing. I had a moment of genius! I would buy plus size underwear that would cover my growing belly!
The underwear department was packed but only one large black lady stood in front of the plus size area.
I started looking at all the different options, when I heard this booming voice next to me say “Why can’t they make plus size panties in silk? Us big girls like silk too!!”
In a horrified voice I quickly answered “Oh, I’m pregnant!”
She then smiled and said “Wow, girl! Congratulations! Let me see your belly!”
She then smoothed out my shirt across my belly and laughed!
“Wow, you are pregnant and you will need … let me see …I think you’re a size ten.”
I just stood there in a stunned silence, as she continued.
“And you will need cotton, Yep, cotton because girl your vagina will need to breath!”
I could not believe that a complete stranger was touching me and then to top it off she just said vagina!! The department was crowded and I could feel people’s eyes burning into the back of my head. Did she stop there? Oh no, she kept on going in a loud happy southern black lady voice!
“Now get these, in the pretty colors because Girl, just because your pregnant doesn’t mean you don’t wanna feel sexy! Oh, yeah! You know what I mean! But remember to let your vagina breath. Stuffs changin’ down there and it’s gotta breath Girl, silk don’t let your vagina breath!”
I stood there with my face burning and tears starting to swell up in my eyes. I have never been so embarrassed. It takes a lot to embarrass me and I was at my breaking point.
“Ok” I said in a squeaky voice.
“Now, Girl don’t be embarrassed! Everyone’s vagina needs to breath! So only get cotton!” she said smiling at me.
I could not believe that I like a lunatic let a complete stranger touch me and then stood there as this lady loudly proclaimed that my vagina needs to breath for the whole underwear department to hear, not once , not twice but over five times!
She gave me one last big smile and walked away.
I then obediently took the size 10 cotton (in pretty colors) package of panties up to the cashier and bought them. I love them and wear them every day and in case you wanted to know…..my vagina is breathing.
